From: Moore Angie-CAM096 Sent: Monday, October 10, 2005 4:47 PM
To: 'Steve Smith'; 'Mom at Home'Cc: 'Lauren E Smith'; Stephanie Cruson; Moore Casey-CCM041; Home Email

Subject: Babies

Mom and Dad,

Thanks for going and praying with Casey and I after church yesterday. We really appreciate all of your love, support, and prayers. After praying yesterday and thinking more about it, God has granted me some well-needed peace in this situation. Some things I remembered as I reflected on what Winston said in the prayer room and other things I have learned about God through my walk with Him since I was 19 or 20: God is in control of everything. He has the power to "authorize" or "forbid" this type of trial to pass over us. Nothing happens without His complete knowledge.

Knowing all of this, I started to question; If I could snap my fingers today and change this baby's condition, if I knew that I would be going against God's will, would I do it? As hard as it is to say, I don't believe I would. God's way's are perfect. He has no blemish. He knows what is best for this baby, for Casey, myself and our other baby, as well as all the people around us that love us and our babies. So as much as it hurts, I can live with the outcome. I will continue to pray for complete healing and that the lesson God wanted all of us to learn from this situation will be learned. But if that is not God's will and this baby is to remain with this condition I will pray for God's perfect and holy will and most of all for His comfort. There are many, many people praying for us and our precious angel. Which also means there are lots of people watching to see how we handle this situation. Will God be glorified?

There is a song that I love and have come to appreciate over the past year as Casey and I have struggled through infertility. "Blessed Be Your Name" is the song. Just two weeks ago Celeste and I had a conversation about this song and we both agreed that this song was our theme song. On Tuesday, this theme song was then tested. The song goes like this:



Blessed be Your name in the land that is plentiful Where Your streams of abundance flow Blessed be Your name And blessed be Your name when I’m found in the desert place Though I walk through the wilderness Blessed be your name Every blessing You pour out I’ll turn back to praise And when the darkness closes in Lord Still I will say Blessed be the name of the Lord Blessed be Your name Blessed be the name of the Lord Blessed be Your glorious name Blessed be Your name when the sun’s shining down on me When the world’s “all as it should be” Blessed be Your name And blessed be Your name on the road marked with suffering Though there’s pain in the offering Blessed be Your name You give and take away You give and take away My heart will choose to say Lord, blessed be Your name

As I was crying and talking to Celeste on Tuesday night I questioned out loud if I could say "Blessed be the name of the Lord" now? I certainly could as we struggled through infertility, but now I wasn't sure.

After praying continually for the past several days, I can say "Blessed be the name of the LORD!" He is holy and perfect and I want to walk in His will, no matter what. I trust that He will carry Casey and I as we take this journey.



I love you very much!



Angie