2010 is over - finally. It has been a long year and a very difficult one for me. I cannot say why this year was different than any other one. Why would the 4 year mark be harder than any other? I've thought a lot about this and have been kicking some things around in my head over the past several weeks. I've wondered if I would even publicly comment on this, but decided I would. Perhaps it is simply cathartic for me, or maybe it will encourage someone else in some way.
My blog's name...God is Good is one I chose after my twins were born. My faith was strong and that was the solid foundation of my life. God is good. He is sovereign. He cared enough for me to send His son to die...for me. Wow. That is truly amazing! But this past year and a half I've had a lot of questions and no answers. (We'll get to that in a minute). My questions....well they are the ones that are expected. "Why did Nathaniel have to die?" "Why did this happen to my baby?" "Was there something I could have done differently to prevent this from happening?"
And then questions I truly never thought would pop into my brain that have shaken my foundation to the very core. "Why does this sovereign God that loves us, allow such horrible things to happen?" And somehow this question made me remember a horrible story that I heard many years ago about a little girl who was adopted from Russia by a U.S. man, who then was abused and locked in a basement. What? Why do I think about these things? I guess I can look at something so obviously horrible, like the holocaust, and it isn't tangible to me. It was a long time ago. I didn't know anyone who was tortured or died from that event in history. But I vivdly thought about this precious child who had high hopes for a better life being crushed by a monster.
Ok so I've digressed a little, but these questiuons started to stay with me. I wasn't mad at God per se, but I had started to not trust Him completely. He doesn't promise that my children will remain healthy. Why should I pray when I don't trust God with the answer....that I may not like at all. I prayed for twins and that prayer was answered. I prayed that my babies would be healthy...that prayer was not. This has been my view this past year. So why should I pray? I never finished writing this post and never published it until now...I'm in a much better place now, but it has been a hard road.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Merry Christmas!
What an incredible Christmas! The kids, Gabe especially, have been so excited about Santa coming. Everyday Gabe would get up and put an ornament on our Mickey Mouse Advent tree.
Christmas morning it was everything Star Wars here at the house, along with a little thomas the train. The boys had so much fun opening their gifts Christmas morning. Gabe's favorite gift is the Imperial Walker Santa brought. That was number one on his list of things he wanted. Gavin got a train and a tricycle along with all sorts of other toys.
After opening presents and having breakfast at home,we headed to Chad & Steph's house to have Christmas with allof them.
Christmas morning it was everything Star Wars here at the house, along with a little thomas the train. The boys had so much fun opening their gifts Christmas morning. Gabe's favorite gift is the Imperial Walker Santa brought. That was number one on his list of things he wanted. Gavin got a train and a tricycle along with all sorts of other toys.
After opening presents and having breakfast at home,we headed to Chad & Steph's house to have Christmas with allof them.
Sunday, November 07, 2010
This one is for the record books...911 call
Gabe has been practicing dialing 911 on our phone lately. A school extra curricular calendar prompted this. I unplug the phone line and had him practice a few times last week. "Check" on the calendar and then we moved on to practicing writing our letters.
Well this evening Gabe was playing with the phone while I was finishing up the cookies he wanted to "help" me make.
I kept telling him to not play with the phone. He said, "911, I know how to dial 911." I said, "do not do that for real, Gabe. That is serious!" I could hear the sequence of buttons on the phone and I never heard him turn the phone on. I finally went and unplugged the phone line so I didn't have to worry about him calling 911 for real. Whew, disaster averted!
Several minutes passed and then the doorbell rang. I look out the window and there are 2 cops standing at the door. My first thought is, "I hope one of the neighbors didn't have a break-in." Why else would 2 policemen be at my door?
Well this evening Gabe was playing with the phone while I was finishing up the cookies he wanted to "help" me make.
I kept telling him to not play with the phone. He said, "911, I know how to dial 911." I said, "do not do that for real, Gabe. That is serious!" I could hear the sequence of buttons on the phone and I never heard him turn the phone on. I finally went and unplugged the phone line so I didn't have to worry about him calling 911 for real. Whew, disaster averted!
Several minutes passed and then the doorbell rang. I look out the window and there are 2 cops standing at the door. My first thought is, "I hope one of the neighbors didn't have a break-in." Why else would 2 policemen be at my door?
Wednesday, June 02, 2010
My precious boys
I just heard Gabe say, "Gavin, it'll be good as new in no time." and "Touchdown, Gavs."
I love all the precious things my boys are saying these days. Gavin can say almost any word you ask him to.
Bubby is Bee-Bub
Helicopter is coper
Brother is brro-der
Cookie - Ki-coo
Cracker-
Swing me- meee me
Hold me - oh mee
Papo (my dad) and by the way this is his favorite person. :)
Grandpa (Grr-pa)
Boat - Bow
Ball
Bath
uh-oh
All Aboard - aww abrrrrd
And if we ask, "Who wants to...go swimming (or fill in the blank)." Gavin respoinds with his hands in the air, "Meeeeee."
Gavin has also started to pretend to be sneezing...he'll say," ahh,ahhh,aahhhhh choo." and then he'll laugh when you do it back to him.
He will see his Bob the Builder sippy cup and start to sing the song. Bob Bwdr ch ch ch\
I'm taking a Beth Moore bible study this summer at church....Jesus the One and Only.
It turns out I'm in class with Gabe's BSF teacher. We didn't recognize each other but once we figured it out she said, "Oh Gabe! He is the sweetest little boy." And he is. Recently he grabbed my leg and hugged it really tight and said, "Mommy I love you. You are the best mommy in the whole world." Awww he is so sweet. He is very affectionate and gives lots of hugs and kisses. He'll come up to me out of nowhere and pucker his lips up for a kiss. He makes my heart melt.
The boys are upstairs playing and I love to listen to them play. They are getting along for now which affords the mommy some needed quiet time. :)
I love all the precious things my boys are saying these days. Gavin can say almost any word you ask him to.
Bubby is Bee-Bub
Helicopter is coper
Brother is brro-der
Cookie - Ki-coo
Cracker-
Swing me- meee me
Hold me - oh mee
Papo (my dad) and by the way this is his favorite person. :)
Grandpa (Grr-pa)
Boat - Bow
Ball
Bath
uh-oh
All Aboard - aww abrrrrd
And if we ask, "Who wants to...go swimming (or fill in the blank)." Gavin respoinds with his hands in the air, "Meeeeee."
Gavin has also started to pretend to be sneezing...he'll say," ahh,ahhh,aahhhhh choo." and then he'll laugh when you do it back to him.
He will see his Bob the Builder sippy cup and start to sing the song. Bob Bwdr ch ch ch\
I'm taking a Beth Moore bible study this summer at church....Jesus the One and Only.
It turns out I'm in class with Gabe's BSF teacher. We didn't recognize each other but once we figured it out she said, "Oh Gabe! He is the sweetest little boy." And he is. Recently he grabbed my leg and hugged it really tight and said, "Mommy I love you. You are the best mommy in the whole world." Awww he is so sweet. He is very affectionate and gives lots of hugs and kisses. He'll come up to me out of nowhere and pucker his lips up for a kiss. He makes my heart melt.
The boys are upstairs playing and I love to listen to them play. They are getting along for now which affords the mommy some needed quiet time. :)
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Four years ago today...
Four years ago today my precious twin boys were born! I cannot believe that 4 years has gone by. It's strange because on one hand it seems like just yesterday...I remember every detail of that bitter-sweet day. And on the other hand it seems like a lifetime ago that I held my precious Nathaniel. Gabe is such a sweet, tender-hearted boy who makes me laugh everyday. We still miss Nate, but know that we will see him again someday. Happy Birthday, Gabe! We love you!
Here's a link to Nathaniel's story and our journey. http://moorefamilyliving.com/nathanieljames.aspx
Here's a link to Nathaniel's story and our journey. http://moorefamilyliving.com/nathanieljames.aspx
Friday, March 19, 2010
Gabe's Birhday
Gabriel saw a Red Lobster commercial the other day and said, "Mom, let's go to Lobsterfest. I love Lobster." I said, "Do you know what lobster is?" He replied, "Yes. Chicken."
So yesterday Casey took half a day off and we went to Red Lobster for lunch.
We ordered him the Lobster pizza and he wouldn't eat it. He ended up splitting Gavin's chicken tenders and french fries. :)
So yesterday Casey took half a day off and we went to Red Lobster for lunch.
We ordered him the Lobster pizza and he wouldn't eat it. He ended up splitting Gavin's chicken tenders and french fries. :)
Monday, February 15, 2010
Playing catch-up
My New Year's Resolution was to be consistent with posting to this blog (which does not mean consistently NOT post). So my goal is to post twice a week. I want Gabe and Gavin to have this as a baby book, so to speak.
Gabe will be 4 next month. It's amazing to me that is even possible. How is it that time has just flown by at light speed?
He has turned from my little baby to a big boy before my eyes. He actually likes to share with Gavin, sometimes. He helps mommy a lot. He is a little snuggle bug! He loves mommy and has recently been giving me lots of what Casey and I used to call "unsolicited" hugs and kisses. He'll say, "I love Mommy and Daddy." And I'll add, "and Gavin." Sometimes he won't correct me. :)
He has somehow gotten this idea that you can only love one or two people. And he'll say, "I like Noah and Brody." And I'll say, "What about Abby and Evan?" And sometimes he says, "No. I like Noah and Brody. They are my best friends." Other times he'll say, "I like Noah, Brody, Abby and Evan." He does this while he counts them on his fingers. Casey and I have tried to explain that he can have more friends.
At a birthday party at the church in December, he asked his little friend Katie if she could have a sleep-over. His cousin Abby has stayed the night a couple of times and he just loves having her over! Katie ran to her daddy and told him Gabe wanted her to have a sleepover. He of course did not like the idea. :) I explained to Gabe that Katie wouldn't sleepover but could come over to play and that Abby can sleepover because she is our cousin.
But now Gabe says, "I want to have Katie over for a playover." And yes, he came up with that on his own.
Gavin is almost 18 months. This completely blows me away. He has just come into his own. In the last 2 months he has gotten so many teeth. He had two on top and two on bottom. And then suddenly his little molars all came in at once. Within a day he had four teeth on top and four on bottom.
He is saying lots of words and has just recently started repeating words when we ask him to. He said "star" two nights ago when we were coming home from church. He calls everyone mommy. His first word was daddy but once he learned mommy he hasn't really used the word daddy again. :)
At one point a couple of months ago he called Gabe "Gaga." He of course, LOVES his big brother.
He says, "Lila." "Wiii---Wa" He says it as if he's calling her. Which reminds me of something funny. When we first got Lila, we were watching the Dog Whisperer to try to train her. From what we learned about her breed she could be very strong-willed. She is a big dog too so she wants to be the boss!!! The Dog Whisperer was not working. I'm sure we were doing something wrong. Casey started using his own technique. we call it the dog growler. He started growling at her and showing his teeth. This has actually really worked! She has really turned into a good dog. Well when Gavin was younger before he could actually talk, when he saw Lila he would growl. Now he will say her name in a growling voice. "Wi-wa ugrrhhh."
It is so cute! He can say cracker, cookie, people could probably understand these words....He says bubble bath, open please...of course no one else can understand these phrases but he says something new everyday! Something he does that is so cute...when he wants something, whether it's a toy, or some milk or crackers he says, "Me. Meee. Meeeee."
He has the sweetest personality, but is also very strong-willed. He will throw temper tantrums if he doesn't like something. especially if I tell him he can't do something or take something away from him. He'll run across the room and hit the couch. He'll sometimes throw himself on the ground and scoot himself backwards on his back. He has also started to throw his head back continuously. Casey and I have been amazed at his temper. He knows what he wants and this became apparent from a very early age.
I love my babies and am so blessed to be able to stay home with them! We have so much fun!
Gabe will be 4 next month. It's amazing to me that is even possible. How is it that time has just flown by at light speed?
He has turned from my little baby to a big boy before my eyes. He actually likes to share with Gavin, sometimes. He helps mommy a lot. He is a little snuggle bug! He loves mommy and has recently been giving me lots of what Casey and I used to call "unsolicited" hugs and kisses. He'll say, "I love Mommy and Daddy." And I'll add, "and Gavin." Sometimes he won't correct me. :)
He has somehow gotten this idea that you can only love one or two people. And he'll say, "I like Noah and Brody." And I'll say, "What about Abby and Evan?" And sometimes he says, "No. I like Noah and Brody. They are my best friends." Other times he'll say, "I like Noah, Brody, Abby and Evan." He does this while he counts them on his fingers. Casey and I have tried to explain that he can have more friends.
At a birthday party at the church in December, he asked his little friend Katie if she could have a sleep-over. His cousin Abby has stayed the night a couple of times and he just loves having her over! Katie ran to her daddy and told him Gabe wanted her to have a sleepover. He of course did not like the idea. :) I explained to Gabe that Katie wouldn't sleepover but could come over to play and that Abby can sleepover because she is our cousin.
But now Gabe says, "I want to have Katie over for a playover." And yes, he came up with that on his own.
Gavin is almost 18 months. This completely blows me away. He has just come into his own. In the last 2 months he has gotten so many teeth. He had two on top and two on bottom. And then suddenly his little molars all came in at once. Within a day he had four teeth on top and four on bottom.
He is saying lots of words and has just recently started repeating words when we ask him to. He said "star" two nights ago when we were coming home from church. He calls everyone mommy. His first word was daddy but once he learned mommy he hasn't really used the word daddy again. :)
At one point a couple of months ago he called Gabe "Gaga." He of course, LOVES his big brother.
He says, "Lila." "Wiii---Wa" He says it as if he's calling her. Which reminds me of something funny. When we first got Lila, we were watching the Dog Whisperer to try to train her. From what we learned about her breed she could be very strong-willed. She is a big dog too so she wants to be the boss!!! The Dog Whisperer was not working. I'm sure we were doing something wrong. Casey started using his own technique. we call it the dog growler. He started growling at her and showing his teeth. This has actually really worked! She has really turned into a good dog. Well when Gavin was younger before he could actually talk, when he saw Lila he would growl. Now he will say her name in a growling voice. "Wi-wa ugrrhhh."
It is so cute! He can say cracker, cookie, people could probably understand these words....He says bubble bath, open please...of course no one else can understand these phrases but he says something new everyday! Something he does that is so cute...when he wants something, whether it's a toy, or some milk or crackers he says, "Me. Meee. Meeeee."
He has the sweetest personality, but is also very strong-willed. He will throw temper tantrums if he doesn't like something. especially if I tell him he can't do something or take something away from him. He'll run across the room and hit the couch. He'll sometimes throw himself on the ground and scoot himself backwards on his back. He has also started to throw his head back continuously. Casey and I have been amazed at his temper. He knows what he wants and this became apparent from a very early age.
I love my babies and am so blessed to be able to stay home with them! We have so much fun!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)